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Tuesday, August 4, 2009

How Much Eye Contact Does It Take to Imitate Love?


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A British scientist determined that, on the average, when talking, people look at one another only to 60 percent of the time. This is not enough to rev up the engines of love at first sight. While he was still a graduate student at the University of Michigan, a prominent psychologist named Zick Rubin became fascinated with how to measure love. Later, at Harvard and Brandeis, the romantic young researcher produced the first psychometrically based scale to determine how much affection couples felt for each other. It became known as Rubin's Scale and, to this day, many social psychologists use it to determine people's feelings for each other. In his study on the ''Measurement of Romantic Love," Zick Rubin found that people who were deeply in love gaze at each other much more when talking and are slower to look away when somebody intrudes in their world.17 He confirmed this through a trick experiment. He asked dating couples a long series of questions so he could first rate the pairs on how much they loved each other. The couples, unaware of their rating, were then put in a waiting room and told, "The experimenter will be with you shortly to start the experiment." Unbeknownst to them, that was the experiment. Hidden cameras recorded how much time the couples spent staring into each other's eyes. The higher the couple had scored on the first test, the more time they spent looking at each other. The less love they felt for each other, the less time they made eye contact.


To give your Quarry the subliminal sense that the two of you are already in love (a self-fulfilling prophecy), dramatically increase your eye contact while the two of you are chatting. Push it up to 75 percent of the time or more if you want to get the PEA gushing through his or her veins. The extra seconds of eye contact speak silent volumes. To a woman, the volumes will read,"Beautiful lady, I am intrigued by you. I am fascinated by what you are saying." A man might interpret the increased eye contact as, "I'm ravenous for you. I can't wait to tear your clothes off and have you make mad passionate love to me." You must, however, look right into your Quarry's eyes if you want to excite those feelings of love at first sight. Not at his eyebrows, not at the bridge of her nose—look right into those baby blues, browns, grays, or greens. Pretend you're admiring the optic nerve behind the eyeballs. Wisdom for the ages gleaned from The King and I is "Whistle a happy tune, and you will be happy." Likewise, give off signals of the two of you being in love, and your Quarry will feel sensations of love

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